theawesomeadventurer:

theawesomeadventurer:

theawesomeadventurer:

happy anniversary to godiwishthatwereme.jpg

caecilius-est-pater:

Perfectly Ordinary Dog

Low strength, very low dex, low constitution, high intelligence, low wisdom, godlike charisma

Is capable of doing anything a PC can do (climb/intimidate/bluff/etc) but with disadvantage on anything that would be difficult or impossible for a dog.

A loyal dog that follows the party. No one knows where it came from. It does its best to help the party, but it only knows a few generic commands. They are:

Sit: Perfectly Ordinary Dog sits.
Leave It: Perfectly Ordinary Dog disengages from all opponents.
Shake: Perfectly Ordinary Dog casts Earthquake.
Come: Perfectly Ordinary Dog casts Teleport on itself to move directly next to the person who issues the command.
Stay: Perfectly Ordinary Dog casts Turn to Stone on itself. The effect lasts until Perfectly Ordinary Dog is told otherwise.
Speak: Perfectly Ordinary Dog casts Speak With Animals on itself. In addition to the spell effects, it removes disadvantage from all rolls involving speech (bluff, etc.)
Sing: Perfectly Ordinary Dog uses Bardic Performance.
Heel: Perfectly Ordinary Dog casts Cure Light Wounds on the most injured party member within range.
Down: Perfectly Ordinary Dog casts Gate and summons a portal to a random netherworld dimension.

The PCs do not know about any of Perfectly Ordinary Dog’s abilities and must find them out via trial and error.

hungwy:

hungwy:

*bows before the bofanian king* I come from the faraway land of Dees. I bring you great gifts of honey, cheese, figs… Nuts…

*king leans forward in his throne* ah, the famous nuts of dees… I bid thee show me them.

*I smile warmly and sweetly and lift up my tunic* anything for my Grace.

hilarioushumorfromouterspace:

yuzuryn:

halfconcealed:

thedeadlygrips:

me

nice try mario

unknownunseenunheard:

Sony, taking back Spider Man after seeing Marvel continuously try and make him Iron Man Jr. while having him consistently fight against demonized working class villains who got screwed over by a billionaire

prrb:

o-ceti:

do non americans know that sometimes you’ll just see lifelike human testicles hanging off the back of peoples trucks

non american here! i wish i didnt learn english

quinn-tessent1al:

b1sky:

boymilk:

me bathing my dog: ohhhhh does she like the water!!! is it waaarrrm!!! ooooo shes gonna be so cleeeaaaan shes a clean little goorrrl gonna smell so goooood!!!!!

my dog in the tub looking like a sad wet rat:

I looked through the notes and these are definitely the best examples of OP’s point